Honesty & Crippling Guilt

Welcome back readers (if any)!  Amazingly enough, some people were bored enough to actually read yesterday's post...shocking but not really surprising when you look at the lengths we go to in our attempts to avoid the work we should be doing.  For example, instead of writing the next installment of the Social Scene series I started (I still owe you 3 more!) or the next Event Star profiles, I'm going to talk about two things that can go hand in hand for a person like me - honesty and guilt.



I like to think that I'm fairly good at helping people figure out their own lives while stumbling blindly through my own.  You would think that this would be a case of the blind leading the blind but it actually works for me.  My theory is that you're too close to everything in your own life to see things like solutions clearly.  Obviously it's easier for an outsider to figure things out for you, which is why we always turn to our friends or family for help. 

I've been the listener in a fair share of heart to hearts (especially when people get drunk and see the invisible sign over my head that says "tell me your problems!") and one thing I've learned is that most of the time people just need to let it out.  They don't always need you to answer the question or give them a solution, they just want someone to share the burden with.  If I do venture forth with advice, I try to be as honest as possible without being hurtful.  If you can't trust your friends to tell you the truth, then who can you trust?  This is true for any situation in life, not just the drunk ones. 

For the sake of honesty, I'm a pretty private person (which can make blogging difficult sometimes) and it takes a while to really get to know me.  There are quite a few things I blur the truth about because frankly, it's no ones business but my own but some people are nosy.  With my love of television and books, I've got a pretty overactive imagination which meant I was a little too good at fibbing when I was younger.  These days, I don't really see the point as most lies are exposed in the end and you just look like a moron once you're busted.  I'm especially truthful when alcohol is involved, as my friends saw this weekend.

In one conversation, I told a guy why I thought he was good for my sister (thankfully it was her boyfriend and not some random) and in another, I told my friend why they weren't a good friend.  It's conversations like the second one that bring out the guilt.  I am a semi-practicing Catholic which means I don't go to Church but I keep the guilt (and most of the other traditions).  Some of my friends know ths about me and use it to their advantage.  Why do I let them take advantage if I know what's going on?  Because I would feel guilty if I didn't. 

This is the reason I try not to committ to anything unless I can ACTUALLY make it and it's why I'll go 30 min to an hour out of my way to make sure people get home ok.  It's the driving force behind my phillanthropy efforts and an integral part of my workaholic nature.  I cannot stand to disappoint so I do whatever I can to make things happen; lucky for you, difficult to manage for me.  Hopefully now that you know this, none of you will use my guilt against me =)