Hi, I'm Awkward!

Before I explain the title, I need to say HI to Denise, our newest follower (and my awesome cousin living in Melbourne)!

I'm sure most of you have had to suffer through awkward moments before; running into acquaintances that you've been dodging on Facebook, seeing an ex with their new you while you're in sweats holding a bag of chocolates, going to a party and being the only single person there - whatever the case it's always painfully awkward.

How can we avoid it?  Sadly there is no way to predict when our awful friend awkward will show its face.  How can we get out of it?  There are a few schools of thought that may or may not work...

1) Make a joke - This could backfire depending on the person.  They will either think it's funny and breaks the ice, or they will be offended and make the moment even MORE awkward!

2) Friend Rescue - If you're out with your friends, this is the best way to do it.  Most friends will realize what's going on and rescue you.  This also applies when one of them has impeccable timing and calls/texts you at the perfect moment.  Make your excuse and run!

3) There's an app for that! - It's called Save Me and is generally used at bars to get away from whom ever is trying to hit on you.  Basically, choose your delay time (5, 15, or 30 seconds) and it fakes a call from your office.  We're talking the call actually comes up on your phone and when you answer, it looks like the call-in-progress page (if you have an iPhone).  Haven't tried it in public yet but it looks pretty sweet.

So with that in mind, I'm off to get ready for another night out with the girls.  Hopefully I won't run into Awkward tonight but if I do, at least I'll be prepared!

Friday Night Lights

Got home tonight past 9 pm and assumed everyone was home by the number of lights still on in the house.  Got inside and realized I was all by my lonesome.  I had to wonder, was this a bout of forgetfulness by everyone or am I being made fun of?

It's no secret that I'm scared of the dark.  My imagination runs wild which causes my heart rate to spike.  I'm not sure why I have a 5-year old mentality when it comes to the dark but there you have it - my number one irrational fear.  One thing I will clarify though is that I'm much better when I know I can turn the lights back on (i.e. at bedtime).  My mom will tell you that I close my eyes before I turn my bedside lamp off at the end of the night but in truth, I haven't done that since I was in elementary school.

My sister will tell you that I sleep with the lights on which is true, but not because I don't want to turn them off.  Sleeping with the lights on happens for two different reasons: 1) I happened to fall asleep with them on while working in bed (which happens fairly often) or 2) I did it on purpose to help me wake up the next day (key for extremely early mornings during the winter months). 

Everyone knows that it's much harder to pull yourself out of bed when it's still dark out.  By having a light on, I trick myself into thinking it's already light out and find it easier to get moving.  This tactic actually works 85% of the time which makes me think that I'm not as smart as I thought since I continually fall for this trick much like setting the one clock over my closet an hour ahead and believing it.

Two things to take from this post? You're never as smart as you think and there's nothing wrong with irrational fears.  I'm off to ponder tomorrow's post and play with some different blogger features =)

UPDATE: So in playing with the post options yesterday (the 11th), I accidentally set this to post a day late!  Oops...that's what happens when you do things half asleep =s I've corrected the posting date (which has been approved by the keeper of my promise but just this one time) and will be back later for today's (the 12th) posting!

Girls who Kick

I went to go watch The Mechanic tonight.  It's about a hitman who takes on an apprentice who just happens to be the son of a man he killed.  There's not a lot of plot but there is a butt load of action!  With all the recent talk about Valentine's day, I felt the need for a bit of violence =) 

On the way to the theatre, I got thinking about strong female characters that kick ass just as well as any macho man while wearing stilettos no less!  Trying to name 5 kick butt females resulted in one of the longest and most hilarious voice recordings to date.  In over 20 minutes, I manage to name exactly 2: Wonder Woman and The Bride from Kill Bill.  After the movie, I asked my younger sister to name 5 and she came up with 2, possibly 3: The Bride from Kill Bill, Lara Croft, and Evy Carnahan - Rachel Weisz's character from The Mummy.  That last one does see some action in The Mummy Returns when she channels her former self Nefertiri, to fight off Anuck Su Namun.  How pathetic is it that between 2 people, we could only name 3-4 characters?  Thankfully IMDb has come to the rescue with another 5 to make this list a bit more respectable.

Obviously the characters already mentioned need no extra explanation as to why they're on this list but I would like to point out that Wonder Woman tops them all (in my book at least) - bullet bracelets, the lasso of truth, an invisible jet - what more could you want?  After WW, Lara Croft (plus any other badass played by Angelina Jolie), and the Bride, we've got Ellen Ripley from the Alien movies, Buffy the Vampire Slayer (brought to life on the big screen by Kristy Swanson and on the boob tube by Sarah Michelle Gellar), and Sydney Bristow from the J.J. Abrams series Alias.  I'm not sure how I missed the last two since I used to watch both of those shows regularly (and still do from time to time thanks to syndication and DVDs).  Maybe it's because I was thinking strictly about movies...

Two additions I have to put in are Milla Jovovich who has been kicking it since The Fifth Element and her Resident Evil co-star, Michelle Rodriguez.  These two ladies are not ones you would want to face down in a fight - much like the rest of the characters on this list, these are the ladies you want backing you up.

UPDATE:  I thought of 2 more but much like Evy, they don't really count - Super Girl and Batgirl.  At this point, we'll take it!

Dinner for Two

I finally finished reading Dinner for Two by Mike Gayle a few weeks ago.  It's about a guy that's got it all - great wife, nice house, job he loves, but is looking for the last piece of the puzzle: kids.  The catch?  His wife isn't interested which coincides with job termination when the music magazine he writes for goes under.  As a favour to a friend, he takes on the most daunting task a magazine writer can take - advice columnist for a teen magazine.  Sifting through hundreds of letters, Dave finds one that changes everything because it's not from a lovestruck girl who needs help.  It's from a girl that happens to be the daughter he never knew existed.

It's interesting to hear a male perspective on accidental pregnancy.  Scratch that - it's awesome to hear a male perspective on anything that has to do with relationships.  I really enjoyed this book not only for it's humour and heart, but also for the way it's written.  Chapters can be as short as a paragraph and as long as several pages.  We move from Dave's narrative to emails to letters and even to magazine articles which provides a nice change in pace from traditional novels. 

One thing I had to keep in mind throughout the book is that I don't know many guys like this and shouldn't assume anything about this type of guy.  Granted most of the guys I know are still fairly young and aren't thinking of settling down yet.  It's interesting to think of what they'll be like when they finally grow up...

I'm left to wonder if guys really do hear their biological clocks ticking louder as the years roll on.  I've seen them in movies, on TV, and read about them in books, but I've never actually met a guy who just wants to stop dating, get married, and pop out some kids.  Women tend to start thinking of these things much earlier in life which supports the theory that we mature faster than men.  However, it's pretty safe to say that women are taking a bit longer to reach the 'settle down' stage than we used to.

When I graduated from high school, we put together a time capsule complete with predictions of what we would be like in 10 years.  Well the time to open it back up is fast approaching and I wonder just how many predictions of "married with 2 kids" have actually come true.  Personally, I never predicted that for myself because somehow I knew that I'd eventually stray off the path to have some adventures.  While having kids is an adventure all on its own, I'm pretty sure it'd put a slight damper/delay on the adventures still to come.  Truthfully, I think I'll be an awesome mom when the time comes.  It's the one thing in the future that I don't worry about, which may explain why I'm not in a rush to get there...

Clearly I've wandered so far away from where I was going when I started this post that I'm not sure where I was going to begin with but I'm sure none of you mind right?  To bring it back to the book, I'm going to toss out a couple of quotes that have stuck with me for the past month...the last one is a little cheesy, but you know it's what every girl wants to hear one way or another.

Dave feels like his friends are rushing their relationship.  They reply, "That's been the problem all along.  I used to think I had all the time in the world to do everything I wanted.  But what's the use of having all the time in the world if you're always wasting it on things that don't mean a thing?"

Madonna on why she never asked Sean Penn to marry her even though she knew he wanted to propose: "It's one thing to have to read a man's mind.  But it's another to have to read it back to him."

Dave's take on how men feel about weddings: "On the surface we might seem unfocused and uninterested but, metaphorically speaking, deep down we know, having walked around the shopping mall of life, we have found the perfect gift for ourselves, which is, of course, you."

Kill Cupid?

We're a week away from V-day...the day when couples think inappropriate PDA's are acceptable, bitter cynics get the rage, and single party people have another excuse to drink on a weekday.

When I was younger, I fell into category number two - bitter cynic rage.  This wasn't due to lack of boyfriends to celebrate with; it was because I really did hate this fake holiday and the commercialism it has become known for.  It's a time of year when flowers, especially roses, cost an arm and a leg and reservations at the best restaurants are at a premium.  The only plus side is that the mother of all PMS necessities, chocolate, flows like water.  Other than that, I figured Cupid could go snap his bow and quit meddling. 

Currently, I'm sitting in group three (single party person) and I hope that I never get brainwashed into group one.  I'm not against the idea of Valentine's Day, I just think that the true meaning of it is something that should be celebrated every day.  Go ahead and try to make the day special for the one you're with, but don't sell your kidney trying to make it happen.  Here are some ideas for the day that I would actually enjoy, and some gifts I'd break my "No Valentine's Gifts" policy for:

1) Dinner at home - nothing says you're worth it than a home cooked meal =)

2) The mixed tape - it's a throw back to the old days when cassette tapes and Walkmans ruled!  Bring it into the 21st century with a mixed CD or iTunes playlist

3) Personalized candy hearts - I hate the taste of candy hearts but even I would swoon at this.  All you need is blank hearts (as big as you can get them), edible ink, and a steady hand.  If you've got big writing, try printing different letters on smaller hearts and use them to spell out a message.  Or you could order them online but that's not as swoon worthy (and is super expensive).  If your mind lives in the gutter, check out this page for some non-PG suggestions.

4) Group Night - laser tag, go-carting, mini golf; whatever your poison, bring out all your friends (single or not) for a fun afternoon or night together.  V-Day isn't just about couples; it's about celebrating all types of relationships!

5) The tourists - If you want to go out and celebrate as a couple, give the night a twist by pretending to be tourists in your own city.  Ask random locals for suggestions, make up characters and stories, fake an accent, whatever floats your boat.  I've done this once before and it was hilarious!

Some of the best Anti-Valentine's
Day shirts out there!

I'll end with this bit of advice - couples, please detach your lips.  I get that you're in love, but Valentine's Day doesn't give you permission to actively throw it in EVERYONE'S faces.  I'm cool with your need for PDA's as long as you're cool with trying to keep it on the DL.  Cynics, come out of hiding.  Get off the bitter bus and face the day like you would any other (unless you're bitter every day).  And to the rest of you, single, ready to mingle people out there, play it safe - you never know who you'll meet and what kind of crazy will appear the next day because you got together on the 14th.  Remember, Valentine's day doesn't mean you'll end up broke or alone if you face it the right way!

Psychic Pods

Honestly, music makes my world go round - it's the one thing I absolutely cannot live without!  I've imported maybe 5% of the music I have into iTunes and am already at 4,100 songs.  This is minuscule compared to true music aficionados, but I'm not claiming to be one of them.  I've got playlists for going out, prepping for a hockey game, soundtracks, driving, rage, reading, sleeping - you name it I probably have it.

There's nothing like a good song to get you pumped up for a party or put you to bed, but the ultimate songs are those that come up at the perfect times.  I swear that my iPod and iPhone are psychic sometimes because even on shuffle, they can pull up the best songs to fit my mood.

Waiting for my mom at the airport yesterday, I passed the time with a debrief with my best friend [she lives in Edmonton =( ].  We went over a heavy topic (i.e. secrets, honesty, etc.) that sent me into moody-thinking overdrive.  First song that came on the radio?  Secrets by OneRepublic, followed by You Run Away by Barenaked Ladies (because I was randomly on QMFM).

Pushing my luck, I turned the radio off and hit shuffle on my iPhone.  Cue Talk to Me by Peaches which I randomly heard on a show over a year ago, listened to for a week then forgot about (my phone automatically fills any empty space with random music from iTunes).

Sometimes the universe sends us signs in the strangest ways.  Who am I to ignore them?

You Spin My Head Right Round

Have I mentioned lately how much I love my friends?  There are old ones, young ones, fun ones, and new ones.  Each of them brings something unique to the table and I'm not sure what I'd do without them.

Unfortunately, this means when I'm trying to figure stuff out, I hear a lot of different things.  This weekend I thought about tackling a problem and asked 3 different people about it.  They each suggested the same action but gave me different approaches and strategies.  You would assume that I know better than to do this by now, but clearly I haven't learned much.

Sometimes talking about something to too many people causes you to lose your own perspective.  Just like a kid spinning in circles, all the opinions rattle around in my head until I'm dizzy and sometimes even lost and/or nauseated. 

So why do I keep going back and asking?  Because I know they're speaking with my best interest at heart and want to make sure I examine all the angles.  Truthfully, I'd rather be confused by my friends than be clueless alone.  At least I know if I fall over, they'll be there to pick me up and point me in the right direction.